Back to School: What Parents Can Do Right Now to Support Executive Functioning

The new school year is around the corner—and for many families, that means a mix of excitement, anxiety, and maybe a little dread about falling back into old patterns.

If your child struggles with executive functioning—planning, organization, time management, emotional regulation—you’re not alone. And you don’t have to wait until the first meltdown of the term to start helping.

At Oak & Ivy, we believe in proactive support. Here are five simple things you can do right now to set your child up for a smoother, more successful return to school.

1. Rethink Routines—Together

Kids don’t need a military schedule—but they do need structure.Now is the perfect time to:

• Ease back into consistent sleep and wake times

• Reestablish regular meals and movement

• Create morning and evening checklists (with their input!)

Make it collaborative, not controlling. When students co-create their routines, they’re more likely to stick with them.

Why it matters: Predictable routines reduce cognitive load and support executive functioning by creating external scaffolding for internal skills.

2. Set Up the Environment for Success

Before the first day, work together to:

• Clear out last year’s backpack and workspace

• Restock basic supplies (folders, chargers, highlighters)

• Designate a quiet, distraction-minimized study area

Even something as simple as a dedicated homework basket can make a big difference in reducing friction when it's time to get started.

Why it matters: Executive function challenges often show up in clutter and chaos. A prepared space lowers the activation barrier for getting started.

3. Practice “Planning Lite”

You don’t need to break out a giant wall calendar (yet), but you can help your child:

• Start using a digital or paper planner again

• Write out a list of upcoming dates (start of term, clubs, sports tryouts)

• Identify one goal for the first week of school

This helps them warm up their planning muscles before they’re juggling five subjects and three deadlines.

Why it matters: Goal-setting and planning are executive functions that benefit from modeling and gradual practice—not last-minute pressure.

4. Talk About Emotional Regulation—Now, Not Later

Big feelings tend to show up in the first few weeks of school. Normalize that early by saying:

“The first week can feel overwhelming. What usually helps you when you’re anxious or frustrated?”

Together, come up with a few go-to regulation strategies (deep breaths, walks, time alone, music, movement, etc.). You’re not trying to eliminate emotion—you’re trying to build awareness and a plan.

Why it matters: Students with EF challenges are more likely to shut down or blow up when they’re dysregulated. Preparing ahead builds emotional resilience.

5. Shift from Manager to Mentor

Instead of saying:

“You need to be more organized this year.”Try:“How can I support you in being more organized this year?”

Instead of asking:

“Did you finish your homework?”Try:“How are you planning to get that done today?”

Start moving away from reminders and control and toward curiosity and collaboration. This helps students take ownership—and helps parents breathe.

Why it matters: Executive functioning grows when students are allowed to make decisions, experience natural consequences, and reflect with support—not shame.

One More Thing: You Don’t Have to Do It Alone

Supporting your child’s executive functioning doesn’t have to fall entirely on you.

At Oak & Ivy, we work with students to build the routines, skills, and self-awareness they need to thrive—while also partnering with parents to make sure the home environment supports that growth.

If you're curious whether coaching is right for your child, schedule a discovery call. We’re here to help make this school year different—for the better.